Most of us say awful things to ourselves prior to speaking: For those who are not as confident as they would like to be in our communication, these negative thoughts increase stress, resulting in a worse outcomes. By virtue of your negative self-talk, you all but ensure a bad communication..
The technique for reversing this vicious cycle is simply to replace negative comments with positive affirmations or mantras. Rather than saying, “I’m going to mess this up,” you instead say, "This is a great opportunity to share my experience with my audience." Note that this affirmation is not unbelievably positive. It's not saying, "This is going to be the best speech ever!" It's just acknowledging the reality that you have a great opportunity to convey your ideas.
Before prepare for a meeting or presentation, you should create some positive affirmations that are relevant and meaningful to you. Then, before you speak, say one of these affirmations to yourself. Affirmations should not be long sayings or contain too many concepts. Research on sports performance has found that simple, one-word mantras (e.g., focus, calm, fun) confer benefits because they eliminate overthinking and reduce negative self-fulfilling prophecies. If you are struggling to come up with useful affirmations, you can focus on values that are important to you, such as education (e.g., “I will teach people something of value during my talk.”), fairness (e.g., “It’s my turn to share my thoughts.”), etc.
Here are some sample positive affirmations you can use:
-People will listen to my ideas.
-My audience will learn something of value from me.
-I can handle this.
-Enthusiasm.
-Connection.
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